I am Clinton. If you’re reading this
-you’ve had hot sauce on your breakfast when most people can only handle at most, toast, eggs and coffee.
-you’ve reached hot sauce Nirvana, the hot sauce high, and you know the bliss of this.
-you’ve stared at food at your local Burger Bland, Blandy’s and McBlandolds food and have wished for your trusty bottle of heat to transcend your food to the next level of tastiness.
-you’ve shook your fist at corporate America’s attempts at spicy.

I understand.

Many sauce makers slap a label praising how hot their product is on a sub-par, mediocre bottle of vinegar. There are more than a few who are passionate in the art of sauce making and have dedicated their lives to this. This site separates the former from the latter. I am here to help in that endeavor.

I will rate sauces on a scale of 1.0-10.0. I will consider heat, smell, taste, packaging, appearance and consistency in my reviews of all things related to hot foods. I will help to separate the passionate sauce maker’s products from gimmicky bottles of shoddy product.

Top 5 Hot Sauces:
• Blair’s Jersey Death
• Crazy Jerry’s Mustard Gas
• El Yucateca XXX Mayan
• Sriracha Chili Sauce
• Dave’s Total Insanity

Hottest Sauce Ever Eaten: I have no idea. It was an assuming little bottle in a Santa Ana authentic Mexican restaurant. It was made at the restaurant and it melted my burrito.

Worst ever experience with fiery food: First time I was humbled, absolutely brought to me knees, was by Dave’s Original Insanity. I was 17 and I thought I was hot stuff. I could take my friends in all of our dumb teen hot sauce competitions. One day a friend broke out a bottle of Dave’s that his dad had. I poured almost half an ounce on 6 small blocks of cheese. I ate them fast because I didn’t think anyone could make anything hotter than what I ever had. I thought I would be fine. I sweat and cried a half gallon of bodily fluids. My head ached. I almost threw up. Imagine when vampires come in contact with light. That’s definitely how I felt. After that I was thrown into a world of heat I’ve never known. You can be damn sure I’ll never leave.

Number of Hot Sauces Owned: Now? I buy them when I need them. I’ve got Dave’s Ultimate Insanity, Blair’s Mega Death, Blair’s Jersey Death, Crazy Jerry’s Mustard Gas and for my only collectable hot sauce, a signed Blair’s 2AM courtesy of my friend Daniel.

Number of Hot Sauces Eaten in Lifetime: Countless. If I find something new I try it even though most hot sauces out there now are vinegar jalapeno soup.

Other Info: I am currently growing Thai chilis and habaneros. I’m also a huge music fan. I’m the only chili head I know that listens to Radiohead and Pavement.

Intro Post: The host to this first post.